For the second night in a row, thanks to the idea from John Jr., I looked at my eyes in the mirror and told myself, “I will have a lucid dream. I will realize I’m dreaming. I will give myself clues and know I’m dreaming. I will not be afraid. I will face my fears. I will not fly away.” This last part is the most important part for me. For the past 2 nights before this night, I had 2 very disturbing dreams with lots of fear. The one, which I wrote about it in my last post, I consciously escaped. The other one, I was stuck in fear. I debate posting it as it was very disturbing. But I was surrounded by people, I was holding them off, not running, but not accepting. Holding my ground. Anyhow, I would like to face these fears in my dreams. Find out what is going on. The dreams of last night brought little to know fear though.
I had a really hard time sleeping last night. I drank the dream tea/added mugwort mix again for the third time. Every other night thus far. I’m beginning to wonder if that is the culprit of my not sleeping. I will try one more time again tonight as a test, because it is also possible it is the influence of the full moon. With this not sleeping though I had many, many dreams. I dreamed of crowded houses and lots of people who were having trouble sleeping. For the first time I remember, my Great Grandmother, who passed when I was 10, was in my dream. And for the first time my Dad’s middle brother was also in my dream. They both had very small rolls. There was also lots of sea creatures (animals), specifically a seahorse octopus, catfish and other imaginary creatures. There were 3 snakes, specifically a Northern Water Snake (though I only remembered the northern part, but when I googled northern and snake, an image of a Northern Water Snake came up and it looks the same as the snake in my dream. Plus the one in my dream was nonvenomous and a water snake. Seems to match). There was an important person named Emu, the police, a naked man, malfunctioning light switches, and over flowing toilets and sinks full of crap which were purposefully sabotaged by a man who was trying to avoid being social.
I think it would be boring to share the details of my whole slew of dreams. But I will share the beginning and ending ones which were more interesting experiences.
Everything is fading to black. I’m waking up. A voice, like a narrator says, “you can find me in the 1960’s…” and then it goes on to say [in philosophy and neo classical studies] or something like that. I remembered when I woke up and immediately when to record it, and then it was gone. Definitely it said 2 things, [in something and in neo something else]. I took the voice to mean that in the 1960s is where to go to look for all these new ideas and theories. (The dream had been filled with philosophical ideas and metaphysical type stuff, but I don’t remember any details)
At 8am I woke up. This is my M-F normal wake up time, but it’s the weekend and I barely slept so I decided I would sleep some more. Plus, I really wanted to have a lucid dream, so I thought this may be a good opportunity.
I am very curious to hear anyone’s thoughts, opinions, and advice on these following experiences. I have experienced this kind of thing before, but not for a long time. It is kind of like a false awakening, king of like hypnagogia, and kind of like sleep paralysis, but really not quite any one of these things:
This first one is the most dream like:
I’m in my normal bedroom. A woman comes in, she is a friend’s mother, but that’s all I remember. She’s talking loudly on the phone and it’s annoying. I think, can’t she see I’m trying to sleep here? And I remember how I’ve been sleeping so poorly all night. I think, I might as well get up now, it’s 8:30am, because there’s no way I’m sleeping with all this noise. I think I might turn on music to drown her out. But then she leaves.
I’m lying in bed, exactly as if I were awake, but maybe I’m asleep. Dreaming or awake and hearing things? I really don’t know. My eyes are closed, but I’m aware of my surroundings. There is this weird whooshing noise. Like the wind, movement, a spirit, something. It seems as if it’s coming from a kid. Like there’s a child spirit in the space between me/my bed and the wall. I’m aware it’s not real. I’m aware that this is somewhat of a dream state. But I also know that I am not fully asleep. I’m wondering if this is some type of hypnopompic hallucination or sleep paralysis, but I don’t try to move. I focus on the sounds and it’s a bit scary. It’s kind of freaking me out. The sound and wind is moving closer and starting to encompass me. I tell myself not to be afraid. I try to imagine that I’m the little kid that seems trapped in this whirlwind of wind and noise. I’m trying to enter into the dream in a lucid state. It goes away.
I’m lying in bed and music is coming from my alarm clock (which is how I set it to go off) I think that it isn’t real. That this is another hypnopompic auditory hallucination. I don’t think I set my alarm this morning. But maybe I did, and I’m beginning to question if I’m awake or asleep. I decide to check. When I move to shut the alarm off, I snap out of it – and the sound disappears. I think I’m fully awake.
I’m lying in bed. Music from my alarm clock startles me. I know it isn’t real. Ok, I think, this is the hypnopompic hallucination again. I know that I’m not fully asleep. It’s not quite a lucid dream, if I try to move, like I did last time, I will just be pulled out of this trance like state. So I try to focus on the dream. I tell myself, I am lucid. I am dreaming. I will have control. Trying to maintain consciousness as I slip into a deeper state of sleep.
I’m lying in bed. New music begins playing. Repeat of above.
I’m lying in bed. A new style of music is playing. Repeat of above.
I’m lying in bed. People begin talking on the radio. A talk show. I know this isn’t real. A type of a dream. Again, not so deep that I can do anything. If I move, I wake up. So I try to focus on what the people are saying. To slip deeper into the dream consciously. Next thing I know, I wake up all the way, remembering all this as well as 2 other dreams. I did not become lucid. So I guess I slipped from this state into a full on dream, then another dream.
All this happened in less than 2 hours.
I don’t know what you would call this. Was it fully a dream? Or just auditory hallucinations? It seemed like the latter. I was awake but hearing things. But if I focused too hard the hallucinations went away. I’ve been trying to read about how to enter a lucid dream from this state. I’m not really sure how to do it, I never have before, and apparently I don’t know what I’m doing. So if anyone has any tips, feedback, advice, or thoughts, I’d appreciate it.