I’ve had 3 dreams in the past month with a good friend of mine who lives a bit far away. The last dream became briefly lucid, but I awoke quickly. They are all just very short clips where the majority of the dream is us embracing. There are some beautiful people I have been blessed to know throughout this life and he is one of them. I didn’t think too much of the first dream, but now that there’s been 3, I’m taking more notice. Typically in this instance I would reach out to him, but alas, I won’t.
The first dream took place on June 30:
In one sense, it was like I was creating this dream. I clearly remember creating the dream design. Z had a baby daughter (but not in waking life). I was babysitting her. I wanted him to appear and then watch me with his daughter for awhile in secret. I would be playing sweetly with her and connecting with her and he would observe this. This would make him see me in a new light, fall in love with me, and want to be with me.
Then the scene is acting out, but I have no conscious recollection anymore of having designed the scene. I’m just playing with the baby and then notice Z. “How long have you been standing there?” I ask him.
“Why didn’t you say something? Why didn’t you tell me you were back?”
“I just wanted to watch you guys interact “
Then he is sitting on the floor. I’m sitting facing him. I lean in and hug him. I don’t let go. He is hugging me back. We just stay like that. It’s very comforting. A slight part of me wonders if I should move back, if he wants the hug to be over, but if doesn’t feel like he does. So I don’t move. I ask him how his day was, while still embracing. He had been at some kind of meditation. He tells me the name, but I don’t remember. It was something about love and light and heart chakra and opening yourself up to relationships. He keeps having to repeat himself because I have a hard time understanding him because his mouth is against my shoulder. The dream ends with us still embracing.
The second dream was on July 7:
There was something strange with Z, like if he put a quarter on his head that meant he wanted to talk to me alone. Then he put the quarter on his head. I waited around. He put the quarter away and got up and we walked off by ourselves somewhere. Like maybe on a wooden playground. He’s apologizing to me. He said earlier we had been talking and he had said he wanted to tell me something. but then didn’t finish. He felt bad about that. I said, “No problem, I understand. Sometimes it can be hard to communicate and you had started to say something, so at least you were trying, which is better than nothing. So it’s totally fine.” He said that he really did want to talk to me and he wanted to tell me something. I think he said something else first, but then he said “I love you (LT).” I was stunned and fell backwards down the stairs and he came down to me to see if I was okay. I grabbed him and pulled him close to me and kissed him. I don’t remember if I said I love you too or just thought it.
The interesting thing with this dream is in a way it was like I was creating it, like the other dream with Z. After he told me he loved me, I was trying to think about how I should react. Should I say I love you too? Should I grab him and kiss him? Would I be stunned? I was trying to decide how I would react before I reacted. Not in the sense that in my brain I was thinking that, but in the sense of I was the director of the interaction. Someone separate that was creating the dream. I decided I would be so floored and happy that I would pass out. I don’t know if I designed the rest of the dream or not.
The third dream was on July 13:
I was sitting in a chair and other people were there. It was outside at a table. Like in someone’s backyard. Z came around and was doing something. I grabbed his hand and pulled him close to me. I embraced him. He said something to me, I don’t quite remember. But something to the affect of he was into me and we should talk about being together if I was interested. I said, yes, definitely. I think I became lucid somewhere during the embrace and I wondered if this was really him trying to talk to me. At some point, while embracing, I was rubbing his back, kind of caressing him. It felt good to hold him and he seemed happy too. Very shortly after becoming lucid though the dream started to fade. I could still feel Z and hear him, but not see him so well. Then he completely faded away.
Everything turned grey, as it usually does when I exit a lucid dream. I tried to hold onto the grey space. To re-enter into the dream. I really didn’t want it to end. I did not become lucid, but I did re-enter the dream, only Z was no longer there.
I was sitting at the same table, in the same setting. A couple friends from waking life stand out. They were a little cold and I loned each of them a jacket/sweatshirt. Then I woke up again.
Analysis – I don’t think I’ve ever had dreams like these. Especially not 3 in a row like this. One time, a few years ago, I had a dream with this same guy and we kissed slightly. It started to become a little more than that and a narrator type voice interrupted the dream saying, “No, not like this. If I’m ever with Z I want it to be real. I don’t want to cheapen him in a dream” I found that really interesting.