Healing at the Root

For the most part, I feel our best healing comes from within. From turning our awareness inwards and finding emotional or mental blockages that are creating the problem. Often it is easier to turn outside ourselves for the answers. Whether we look to western doctors and a pill, massage therapy, reiki, or acupuncture, or to books and on-line information about chakras, numerology, and mind body connection in terms of particular links to ailments.

We use our brains and ability to think way too much and often I feel it only gets in the way. It is a great tool, this ability we have to process and analyze. But all too often I feel we, myself included, forget about our greatest asset. Which lies within the heart, the spirit, the silence. The inner knowing that we all have if we can just silence ourselves enough to hear it. Trust enough to listen to it.

More than anything, I feel something like massage, reiki, or acupuncture can potentially help because of the ability it has to bring us into deep relaxation and a trance like state. It is in this dream like state of awareness where we can find true answers if we are willing to look. Not to negate the healing ability of any form – western or eastern. But I believe they will all just treat the symptoms. Heal the surface. But the inner problems will come bubbling up once more if we do not heal the root. When our problems have taken over our bodies we often do need some form of extreme healing that exists outside of ourselves in order to instill enough balance to be able to function. Pain can be quite debilitating. But just functioning is not enough.

No matter how much exercise and yoga I do to maintain my physical health, in regards to my back. It is never enough if I continue to allow myself to get caught in the veil, fall victim to self-doubt, or deny my true passion. It was actually pretty great today. I’ve been kind of spiraling out. I had an absolutely amazing time at a beautiful place a couple weeks ago. I rode the high afterwards for about a week. It was natural and unfortunately normal for me to eventually come crashing down, as I always do. Crashing. I can never seem to hold on to the space where everything is one and makes perfect since. Where I know all is right with the world and myself. As I’ve been finding myself sinking deeper into the veil, the illusion, and questioning my own power, abilities, and general self worth – I find my back tightening up. Taking me out. I was doing some basic stretches, trying to find the space, the knowing silence within, and a very negative thought charged with emotion passed through my mind. My back immediately spasmed up with this thought. I could very easily see a direct correlation.

Knowing why my back is acting up doesn’t automatically cure the pain, unfortunately. Time heals, as does change. But this change I need is an ongoing constant inner battle. When I’m free – traveling, out in the world. Not living in a house, spending my time indoors, going to work. But out, adrift. Everything makes since. I don’t question anything or myself. I know what I know and I live in bliss regardless of what the world throws at me. But behind 4 walls, in a town, in a rendition of a 9 – 5, trying to fit in and make it with the masses – I just can’t keep my shit together for long periods of time.

Somehow this writing took a direction than I wasn’t planning on, but I’ll leave it at that.


11 thoughts on “Healing at the Root

  1. Hello Lost Truth,

    There is just something about being outside in nature that helps me too (especially being near moving water like a beach or boardwalk or river et cetera with a breeze), well if the circumstances are comfortable, and so I usually have to walk outside every day to help keep balanced (sane). 😉

    Unfortunately for me this is getting harder with our new neighbors who almost always have a constant stream of people going and coming every day and open doors and windows et cetera, I have never seen a house with this much traffic in my life, not even illegal drug dealing should cause that amount of traffic. 😀

    When I do my daily walks in the yard outside I usually do not want to be seen or heard, this is my period of trying to balance and heal and recover from the anxiety of the day and think and daydream et cetera, and so the new neighbor situation has negatively effected / affected this (our house and street is surrounded by houses on all sides, several are abandoned fortunately, but that one is no longer abandoned now and it is in the back where I walk which has some of the only shade in the yard at certain times and has the most privacy); but my increased strength training in my exercise routine has helped me somewhat make up for this.

    Anyway, enough about me, thank you for sharing this and I hope you are able to heal your back.

    -John Jr

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I can definitely relate to needing that alone time outside in nature to decompress, regroup, and find sanity. That sucks that your neighbors have been infringing on your peace. Can you wear headphones and listen to music or podcasts to isolate yourself from them? That’s what I do when I walk around the neighborhood. But I always prefer to be somewhere more in nature, as you said, by a creek or river or something, where there is minimal people and minimal noise.

      When I was in Oregon I read a sign, and took a picture of it, that said “One way negative ions are generated is by breaking the surface tension of water. Falling water does this. Inhaling these ions increases the amount of oxygen in your brain, kills germs that cause illness, and increases seratonin levels (improving mood, increasing mental alertness, and relieving stress). The amount of negative ions in the forest, especially near moving water, is thousands of times greater than in your home. No wonder waterfalls are such a popular hiking destination!” A little science to back up why we feel better in nature and near moving water.

      Thanks, I hope my back gets better soon as well

      Thanks for your comment

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hello Lost Truth,

        Unfortunately that will not work in my situation, it is not noise but just the fact that I will be seen and will have to see other people 😀 , I wish it was just sound because listening to music is one of the things that I do when walking outside sometimes and that is what I do on jogging days when I jog in the yard.

        Fortunately the situation is not bad enough to where I can not walk, I just can not get as comfortable and I walk less and less often each day now.

        Thank you for sharing that scientific knowledge with me, that is pretty cool. 🤓

        You are welcome, and thank you for replying.

        -John Jr

        Liked by 1 person

          1. Hello Lost Truth,

            That would be nice but I think that my subconscious is a bit too cautious and on alert and tries to be aware and worried about my surroundings (physical, social, et cetera) et cetera, which is probably one of the reasons I have problems with social anxiety, et cetera. 😀

            -John Jr

            Liked by 1 person

  2. Sometimes I think my brain gets in the way. I have a background of analyzing things and thinking critically and there are times when it gets in the way. I often have difficultly letting go and surrendering to concepts that aren’t neceessarily rational or logical. I’ve noticed this in my yoga and meditation practices and I think be a bit of a blockage for me in my lucid dreaming practice. By the way, I’m enjoying Robert Waggoner’s book.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I think a lot of people can relate to that. It seems pretty common to want to solve problems with our logical brain even though our instincts (or whatever you want to call it) already have the answers if we can just trust and listen. I know I’m happier when I can use my analyzing abilities as a tool opposed to a ruling compass.

      I’m glad you’re enjoying the book. I’m just about finished with it myself. I really enjoyed it as well. I have often become lucid in a dream and then been able to recall things from the book and use it to my advantage while dreaming. Which I think is really kool. The next book I have lined up to read is “Dreaming Wide Awake: Lucid Dreaming, Shamanic Healing, and Psychedelics” by
      Brown, David Jay.

      Thanks for your comment


  3. It’s very discouraging to discover that healing the root means means much more than healing whatever particular mental, vital, or physical suffering we endure, or, to actually heal it where it no longer causes us to suffer means a holistic healing that entails a fundamental change in our consciousness and way of being human, call it realization if you want, but in calling it that we make it something so other it seems impossible to ever get to. It’s discouraging because such a holistic change is so hard to attain since it’s not something rational that involves certain steps to get there, and, if you haven’t had at least momentary experiences of it, you don’t even really know it’s there and possible to attain. You can only believe, and suffer all the doubt the mind attacks belief with. It does help to know you are in transition to it, but this transition place is terrible with its vicissitudes.

    You personally see the direction so well, to the inside, and you have the inner doors open to explore. I hope you stumble across what I’m talking about to give you the certitude you need to know something is indeed there. With that certitude, discouragement can be more easily overcome, and you just learn to be patient, not in expectation for it to happen at any moment, but the patience that comes when you realize this change is so much bigger than you and even than this your present life, but it is inevitable. I find myself having to accept where I’m at, in all these ups and downs, learn to be better there but try at the same time to be as open as I can to such a monumental change, make that, and not simply healing whatever disorder, the focus of my search.

    I appreciate so much your sincerity and goodwill. It’s a bit incredible.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Donny. And thanks your comment.

      I like what you said about patience. Something I can sometimes lack. And to focus more on being open to a monumental change opposed to healing a disorder. I will take this to heart.
      Thank you


      1. I think it’s important to say, in regards to my process, and it may be the same with many, that the disorder being healed is what had me see and seek a fundamental change in consciousness, because I saw the real root is the ego itself and being centered and organized around it. Without the disorder I’d have had no reason to see that, and the disorder, or my ability to not let it get to me, has become a measure of the move towards a monumental change whereby the ego is no longer the captain of my ship. In other words, its healing is still important. I don’t abandon that effort, just put it in a much larger and more fundamental context where it’s not a disorder being healed but me moving out of ego consciousness altogether.

        I’ll add to that of course it’s possible to be healed of many thing without such a monumental change, but that would depend on how much whatever’s wrong with you is intertwined with your identity. Even still, say if you’re healed of cancer or some other major physical disorder, or one of the heart whereby you do not easily love others, or one of the mind where you have psychotic episodes, and I’m just using examples here, you will always be open to either a return of it or another disorder equal to it to afflict you. It’s like we have these things so to see and work for real change.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I completely agree with both of your points. As frustrating and debilitating as physical pain can be (which is what I seem to encounter most) I am also very thankful for it. It is my guiding light and sail that sets me on the right path. If we just coasted through life we would never see a reason to challenge ourselves or address aspects of Self. For me, pain is my wake up call (among other things) and I know it will not go away until I no longer need to be woken up. So maybe never 🙂 haha I have a very strong link with my body in the sense I feel it doesn’t allow me to get away with much. Not communicating – pain. Straying off path – pain. Stressing – pain. Self deprecating thoughts – pain. But until the pain comes I am usually not aware that something needs addressing, or at least I allow myself to be in denial of it.

          I get that focusing on monumental change could be more beneficial though. For example, instead of just thinking – why did my back go out on me and start spasming this time? Approach it more from what general belief/story/conditioning do I hold in my core that keeps bringing me back to this place again and again? It is an interesting concept. I have found when I do come to a real conclusion/realization/epiphany there is a release in a way. I feel lighter and know that I have hit the nail on the head. It can be very difficult to see this core belief we hold, but I’ve found when the light is finally shined on it, it was actually very obvious after all, at least in my case thus far.


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